Divorce can be an emotionally charged time in one’s life. Add children into the mix, and conflicts can arise and become heated between you and your soon-to-be ex-spouse. Co-parenting after a divorce is a tricky prospect. You will need the assistance of a family law attorney who can remind you of your rights. With the aid of a skilled father’s rights attorney, you have someone on your side who can fight for those rights if need be.
If you find yourself dealing with an uncooperative ex or an ex who, it feels, is trying to actively undermine you or harm your relationship with your children, it can be difficult to know what to do in co-parenting situations. Here at Stange Law Firm, we understand that these can be trying times, especially when relations with a co-parent are tense. Here are some tips on how to handle co-parenting conflicts with your ex-spouse.
Common Co-Parenting Issues
Several co-parenting issues can arise between ex-spouses. These can include the following:
- Having Different Parenting Styles: Similar to couples who are still married, two people will most likely have different parenting styles. The four main types of parenting styles seen today include neglectful parenting, laid-back parenting, authoritarian parenting, and authoritative parenting. Poor parenting choices could lead to the loss of custody or visitation rights.
- Dealing With Emotional Instability: Your spouse might show their own unstable emotions by lashing out, being verbally abusive, becoming unpredictable, or withdrawing altogether. This can be incredibly stressful and leave you and even your children uncertain of how to respond. During this time, it might prove wise to enlist the help of possible restraining orders if your ex is deemed a danger to you or your children.
- Poor Communication: A common issue seen among co-parents is poor communication. This communication could be unclear, inconsistent, or absent altogether. Making decisions about your child’s welfare or education could prove difficult if your ex refuses to communicate in a proper manner. If your ex is using poor communication to manipulate your time with your children, it is wise to contact a lawyer.
Ways to Handle Co-Parenting Conflicts With Your Ex-Spouse
It is important to remember that you cannot change a person. You can, however, do what is in your power to improve communication and the relations between you and your ex. That way, you can avoid feeding into the conflict. There are many ways that you can do this. However, if your ex is being malicious or doing things to go against or break your custody agreement, you will need the help of an attorney. In most cases, the following actions are a good place to start:
- Set Healthy Boundaries: To create and maintain a healthy co-parenting arrangement, one of the most important things you can do is set healthy boundaries for all involved. These can relate to healthy communication styles, the frequency and method of this communication, personal space, and living space.
- Do Not Talk Poorly About Your Ex: One of the worst things you can do as a co-parent is speak badly about your ex in front of or directly to your children. This can harm your children’s mental and emotional health. If it gets back to the judge, it can also harm your chances for a positive outcome in any child custody battle.
- Keep Documentation: It is essential that you maintain clear records of any communication, agreements, or conflicts that arise, as they could prove vital in a custody battle. Keep a file, either physically or digitally, when documenting discussions on custody, visitation, exchanges of the children, and any incidents that occur.
FAQs
Q: What Should I Not Do as a Divorced Parent?
A: It is wise that you never put your children in a position where they feel like they have to pick a parent or that they are stuck between you and your ex. Likewise, you should avoid certain behaviors, such as:
- Talking badly about your ex to your children
- Making your child feel as though they have to pick you over your ex
- Questioning your child about their relationship with your co-parent
Q: What Are My Rights as a Father?
A: Nowadays, fathers have just as many rights regarding their children as mothers do. As a father, you have the right to equal child custody, visitation, and make important decisions on your child’s education, medical care, and upbringing. You also have the right to prevent your ex from interfering with your own parental duties.
Q: What Should I Do If My Child Is Struggling With the Divorce?
A: If your child appears to be struggling with the divorce, the right thing for you to do is allow them the space they need to tell what they’re feeling and express their emotions. If the relationship between you and your ex is especially strained, your children might feel as though they need to pick sides. Do whatever you can to reassure them of the fact that you love them, no matter what, and that none of this is their fault.
Q: How Much Does It Cost to Hire a Divorce Lawyer?
A: It can be difficult to provide an exact estimate of how much it might cost to hire a divorce attorney. There are several factors involved that will affect the final cost analysis. These can include:
- The complexity and nuances involved in your case, such as child custody or visitation rights being disputed
- The cooperation of your spouse
- The experience and success record of your attorney
Contact a Trusted Family Lawyer Today
Co-parenting can have several positive impacts on children. However, if you and your spouse are unable to cooperate, this can lead to negative effects felt by all involved. Whether you are expecting a divorce or a custody battle following a divorce, you need someone on your side who is willing to fight for you and your rights as a father. Contact Stange Law Firm today. We can review your case and help determine the right course of action to aid your family.
